Don & Napoleon Dynamite - Napoleon Dynamite Quotes
Don Hey, Napoleon. What did you do last summer again?
Napoleon Dynamite I told you! I spent it with my uncle in Alaska hunting wolverines!

Grandma & Napoleon Dynamite - Napoleon Dynamite Quotes
Grandma How was school?
Napoleon Dynamite The worst day of my life, what do you think?

Deb & Napoleon Dynamite - Napoleon Dynamite Quotes
Deb What are you drawing?
Napoleon Dynamite A liger.
Deb What's a liger?
Napoleon Dynamite It's pretty much my favorite animal. It's like a lion and a tiger mixed... bred for its skills in magic.

Kip & Napoleon Dynamite - Napoleon Dynamite Quotes
Napoleon Dynamite Hey can I use your guys's phone for a sec?
Secretary No. 1 Is there anything wrong?
Napoleon Dynamite I don't feel very good.
[takes telephone and dials number]
Kip [making nachos on the other line] Hi.
Napoleon Dynamite Is grandma there?
Kip No, she's getting her hair done.
Napoleon Dynamite Ugh!!
Kip What do you need?
Napoleon Dynamite Can you just go get her for me?
Kip I'm really busy right now.
Napoleon Dynamite Just tell her to come get me.
Kip Why?
Napoleon Dynamite Cause I don't feel good!
Kip Well, have you talked to the school nurse?
Napoleon Dynamite No, she doesn't know anything.
Will you just come get me?
Kip No.
Napoleon Dynamite Well, will you do me a favor then? Can you bring me my chapstick?
Kip No, Napoleon.
Napoleon Dynamite But my lips hurt real bad!
Kip Just borrow some from the school nurse. I know she has like five sticks in her drawer.
Napoleon Dynamite I'm not gonna use hers, you sicko!
Kip See ya.
Napoleon Dynamite Ugh! Idiot!

Rex - Napoleon Dynamite Quotes
Rex At Rex Kwan Do, we use the buddy system. No more flying solo. You need somebody watching your back at all times. Second off, you're gonna learn to discipline your image. You think I got where I am today because I dressed like Peter Pan over here?[while pointing to Napoleon]

Pedro & Napoleon Dynamite - Napoleon Dynamite Quotes
Napoleon Dynamite What kind of bike do you have?
Pedro It's a sledgehammer.
Napoleon Dynamite Dang! You got shocks, pegs... lucky! You ever take it off any sweet jumps?
doubt in my mind.